Here will be my first, last and only 9/11 story, I was skipping class at USM when it happened, mom called, I woke up and answered the phone and she just said "baby turn on the TV, and why are you not in class?" I turned on the TV and saw the same thing on every channel, it was surreal, I thought it was some bad scifi movie and thought "ok I'm dreaming, this isn't real, it can't be". Next, my Mom says the realest thing I ever heard her say "baby, you have to grow up fast and get tougher, you know your going to war soon, you might die, you signed up for this, you're a marine, I can't protect you this time, you're a man".
My Mother did not seem too shaken, me on the other hand, i was terrified because i specifically remember my recruiter saying "you will probably do your whole contract without having to go to war, We're in peace times" but here we are 4 years later and that statement was just made void. Then another call came in, it was my unit in Jackson, I kept ignoring the call, afraid of what the caller may say if I picked up, I was a coward as the phone rang, my days of skipping class, flirting with girls in the plaza, cramming for exams and drunk nights with the fellas was about to be over. When I finally answered it was Gunny Townsend, he says "Alright Givens, you know what this is, get your head ready devil dog" then he read down the scripted letter for a muster call, I hung up and got my bags ready, my phone wouldn't stop ringing, I never answered again, I was scared beyond fear, no video games or movies compared to what I was about to see, experience or possibly do, in real life.
I went outside and saw how the event effected everyone at school, instant hate was transferred to almost every foreign exchange student on campus, it was not their fault but because of their ethnic background or origin they were targeted for revenge and retaliation. Paranoia spread almost instantly in the area. Almost all Arabic or middle Eastern descent students started leaving and within the next few weeks the campus was like a Ghost town, the energy of the "college life" had become dead, almost nonexistent, no more parties, drinking, the "Golden years" was officially over. I became numb, i was consumed with thoughts of death and war, i stopped going to class, i didn't see the purpose. I lost my appetite for life and slipped into a deep depression and as a result I was put on academic probation which pushed me further into darkness I lost weight and eventually became so sick my friends had to intervene. My friends did not know why my attitude had changed so drastically, nor could I put into words what had driven me so far beyond my normal "joking class clown" self. At this same time, My girlfriend was pregnant and we were "semi engaged" and my mother was Diagnosed with cancer and was no longer able to work, there was no hope of graduating and the chances of another semester with assistance was out the window. I decided to formally withdraw from school and return home to help out with my Mother.
I returned home to McComb Mississippi where i vowed never to return to without making something of myself (looks like i failed in that department) Graduated with honers from High school, Athlete, semi popular and completed Three years of community college at Southwest, reduced to a saddening defeat with one phone call, was I that weak?? i took a job at Wal-Mart distribution in shipping where the hours where long and we refereed to it as "equal opportunity slavery". It did not matter if you were black, white, purple, green or blue, you worked 12 hours non stop in the back of trailer stacking boxes. We did anything to make the day go by faster, nothing worked. I began getting into a routine and starting to adjust from college life to small town living, it wasn't much but it was an existence. Helping my Dad with the bills when I could and driving my mother back and forth to treatment during the week did have a satisfying feeling though. It took my mind off of my initial fears, or so I thought....
My Mother did not seem too shaken, me on the other hand, i was terrified because i specifically remember my recruiter saying "you will probably do your whole contract without having to go to war, We're in peace times" but here we are 4 years later and that statement was just made void. Then another call came in, it was my unit in Jackson, I kept ignoring the call, afraid of what the caller may say if I picked up, I was a coward as the phone rang, my days of skipping class, flirting with girls in the plaza, cramming for exams and drunk nights with the fellas was about to be over. When I finally answered it was Gunny Townsend, he says "Alright Givens, you know what this is, get your head ready devil dog" then he read down the scripted letter for a muster call, I hung up and got my bags ready, my phone wouldn't stop ringing, I never answered again, I was scared beyond fear, no video games or movies compared to what I was about to see, experience or possibly do, in real life.
I went outside and saw how the event effected everyone at school, instant hate was transferred to almost every foreign exchange student on campus, it was not their fault but because of their ethnic background or origin they were targeted for revenge and retaliation. Paranoia spread almost instantly in the area. Almost all Arabic or middle Eastern descent students started leaving and within the next few weeks the campus was like a Ghost town, the energy of the "college life" had become dead, almost nonexistent, no more parties, drinking, the "Golden years" was officially over. I became numb, i was consumed with thoughts of death and war, i stopped going to class, i didn't see the purpose. I lost my appetite for life and slipped into a deep depression and as a result I was put on academic probation which pushed me further into darkness I lost weight and eventually became so sick my friends had to intervene. My friends did not know why my attitude had changed so drastically, nor could I put into words what had driven me so far beyond my normal "joking class clown" self. At this same time, My girlfriend was pregnant and we were "semi engaged" and my mother was Diagnosed with cancer and was no longer able to work, there was no hope of graduating and the chances of another semester with assistance was out the window. I decided to formally withdraw from school and return home to help out with my Mother.
I returned home to McComb Mississippi where i vowed never to return to without making something of myself (looks like i failed in that department) Graduated with honers from High school, Athlete, semi popular and completed Three years of community college at Southwest, reduced to a saddening defeat with one phone call, was I that weak?? i took a job at Wal-Mart distribution in shipping where the hours where long and we refereed to it as "equal opportunity slavery". It did not matter if you were black, white, purple, green or blue, you worked 12 hours non stop in the back of trailer stacking boxes. We did anything to make the day go by faster, nothing worked. I began getting into a routine and starting to adjust from college life to small town living, it wasn't much but it was an existence. Helping my Dad with the bills when I could and driving my mother back and forth to treatment during the week did have a satisfying feeling though. It took my mind off of my initial fears, or so I thought....
Eventually me not being able to really leave my Sick Mother unattended during the week and me working on the weekends had a huge toll on my relationship, I offered her the option of staying with me in Mccomb so we could handle the pregnancy together but that seemed pointless, She started to become bitter over my decision and then "lost the baby".......I'm not sure if it was a natural loss though. Then of course she left me, at that point I can't say that I cared much, I was so low that not much mattered anyways. Sure it hurt immensely but what's left after you hit the bottom?
Years pass and during that time my Mother also passed, I was still working at the Walmart plantation and finally get the call.........We were being deployed to Iraq. By this time I was comfortable in my existence, I had accepted my defeat and I was content with how the cards had fallen. We all went through the usual dog and pony show at the unit and our families were briefed on what would happen next. They got the watered down version. Us, The Marines were however given the unedited directors cut. We were shown a video of a man being decapitated. His head was severed from his body as blood spilled out everywhere, his body still moved in an almost automatic manner and still gasped for air while headless. This was now my reality. This was now my world. I was now an E4 in the Marines which holds it's own responsibilities. I was Squad leader of 3rd squad, about 14 or so guys I'd die for. After the video was over the Gunnery Sergeant says "THIS is your enemy, he will not hesitate to do this to you, it's time to man up and do what we do best and that's destroy ANYTHING in our path. I won't lie to you, some of you won't make it back, you will never be the same if you do return." Look to your left and your right, that man is your brother and you take care of him, you protect him, you die for him if need be". I went to the bathroom and splashed my face with water. My Dad met me in the hallway and he hugged me like he never did before. Then he gave me some Bible verses to remember. "No weapon formed against me shall prosper" I wrote it on the inside of my helmet. That night was one of the longest ever after the families left. We all stayed up that night, headed for North Carolina the next morning.
In North Carolina we did the usual in processing, stayed there for weeks and we all got closer and comfortable. I even met a woman that was really cool with the initials "NJP" it was funny because when you get in trouble in the Marines you have non judicial punishment. ......NJP lol. Her mother was a Marine so it was a running joke. she was the last woman I kissed before leaving for Iraq. I guess she knew what I was in for and saw that I needed that human connection. In the next hours of our lives we got ready to ship out.
We were finally "in country" after a few stops and we landed in Camp Victory, I was Hot, VERY hot and dry, the landing strip was beat up, everything was dusty, it seemed like something out of the Chronicles of Riddick movies. We formed a human chain, unloaded our bags and went to our tents........I remember being exhausted, sweaty and scared at the same time but a strange calm rested over me from that day forward. Sure I was scared but never thought that I would lose my life. I felt invincible like I had a bubble of protection around me. We were finally "Here".
Camp Victory was nice, it had paved roads, a great dining facility, recreation center complete with flat screen TVs and an indoor pool area........and just when we got used to it........we loaded up the 7 Ton Trucks and drove for hours across the desert to our ACTUAL base. An abandoned train station in the Al Ambar Provence or Iraq. Rusted out trains surrounded the place, emptied buildings became our command center, plywood tents lined with sandbags around the sides became our living quarters. ......I asked the question "what's up with the sandbags?" And the Staff Sergeant replied "it's for mortor fire"......."sooooo don't they get shot and fall down? Why isn't the roof covered then?".......I got a "you smart ass" look but no reply lol. From that day we faught, we drove, we patroled, we cried, we hurt, we became hardened, we thrived, we pushed, we destroyed, we rebuilt, we weathered sand storms, we attacked, we were shot at, we were blown up, we settled in, we ran for cover, we lost limbs, we lost brothers, we lost lives, we saw death, we saw evil, some of us.....killed we passed the torch to the new unit of Marines that took our place in history so that they can restart the journey we just experienced. Trial by fire. Ours had ended. Changed men forever, Fathers, Sons, Brothers and Husbands we will never be the same. So much happened during that time I can't bore you with every war story but I can tell you this. That scared college kid I was ceased to exist the day I stepped off that plane. I gained a strength within myself that was born through the fact that my brothers lives depend on my ability to lead and fight along side them and WE are each others lifeline. We don't do it for glory or medals, praise or title.......we fight because we LOVE our country and we fight because we LOVE our families. The Marines of Echo battery 214 Artillery Unit will always be my family. I am proud to have served with some of the most loyal, brave and heroic Men to ever walk the face of the Earth. Ok some were some idiots but I'd still die for those dirty bastards. On this day I remember all those who lost their lives to terrorism and I, along with my brothers and sisters will continue to fight for Freedom. I wrote this years ago and couldn't finish it because some of the memories were too painful to bare. I've seen so much that I still can't fully express it. I left out most of what occurred there because every serviceman has their own story. We can all relate but this one is mine. Never forget. Always remember. SEMPER FI.
